The Farmhouse, Crumbling

Copyright Janet Webb

Everyday I pass it by, another reminder of the people who once settled here, who fought to tame the wild, who fought to impose themselves on the world, no matter how fleeting their victory.

Everyday I pass it by, imagining the buzz of machinery as the town around it grew, imagining the terror of those whose blood still stains the walls as civility collapsed.

I’ve never gone inside, no matter how my stomach gnaws on fraying nerves.

The faces half-glimpsed through shattered window-frames warn me away, the echoing, creaking roof echoes my terror.

Everyday I avert my eyes, staring at the weeds growing through cracked pavement.

Overnight a white picket-fence sprung up.

Today I looked up and saw her.

Tomorrow I’ll not pass her by.

Slightly too long, but still written for the Friday Fictioneers. Comments and criticism welcome, as always! 

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14 thoughts on “The Farmhouse, Crumbling

  1. Dear Chris,
    Sounds like something promising for him on the horizon. However I’d be leery of that picket fence that sprang up overnight. Clear, concise writing with good description.

  2. Anonymous says:

    I really like this…good great writing here, very well done

  3. boomiebol says:

    I really like this…good great writing here Chris, very well done

  4. Nicely creepy and I’d be leery of that overnight fence, too.


  5. Mridubala says:

    I loved the way you twisted the nostalgic or creepy setting into a totally different and fresh one, nice, well done!

  6. Interesting take on the photo prompt.

  7. A slight criticism, if it’s all right. This line was awkward to me because the same word was in it twice in such close succession: “Echoing, creaking roof echoes my terror.” Perhaps one could just say the creaking roof echoes the terror? Or maybe the close juxtaposition was intentional, in which case never mind.

    I love the first two lines; they grab my attention right away. The fence creeping up is eerie and makes me curious about what’s next.

  8. […] The Farmhouse, Crumbling by ChrisWhiteWrites ~ @chriswhitewrite ~ Less than 500 words ~ Unspecified genre […]

  9. ganymeder says:

    So much with so little words. Nice and hopeful.

  10. Nice job on this one. Really enjoyed it.

  11. Abraham says:

    Very good. Nicely mysterious. Intriguing!

  12. Joe Owens says:

    Stories like this leave me wondering what follows. You did a great job building up the story.

Comments and criticism always welcome!

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